You know, when I was in college I didn't think that time could move faster than it was at that point in time. Each quarter meant new classes, there was so much to do but so little time... or so I thought. Now that I'm a wife and mother I can't help but smile fondly in remembrance of that blissfully naive young girl that thought taking pole classes and going to class three days a week was a full load. How nice is it though to have the opportunity to look back on our younger years with fresh eyes. Nothing stings as bad as it did in the moment and maybe you even get a good laugh out of the lessons you learned the hard way.
Last year was easily the most incredible year of my life. Mike and I celebrated one year of marriage, we welcomed Dean, bought a house, hosted events, it was amazing. But it also came with it's challenges. Some that now, I can look back on as lessons learned. They've been weighing on my heart and mind for some while now so I figured I may as well write the words and set them free.
Numero Uno: Everyone you meet will not be your forever friend.
This one was tough. Every part of my being longs to see others happy. I've always been that way. If you need something and I have even a third of it, it's yours. This past year I learned a lot about my standing friendships but where this hit me the hardest was in my business. Through Akia and Company, I get to meet some pretty amazing people. Naturally, I treat everyone I work with as a friend that it's been way too long since I've seen last. Now this is a great thing, and why I believe people refer my work to other people they know. That being said I get emotionally involved before the "second date" and I'm bummed when for whatever reason the friendship doesn't pan out the way I expected it too. There was one situation last year that really hurt. It occupied my thoughts, became the topic of discussion more than I'd care to admit, and I'm sure that my best friends I have a group chat with were just plain over it. What I learned is that I hated the way it felt letting something so small consume so much of the way I felt about myself and how I ran my business. So I let it go. I can't help who I am and how much I truly love helping others. But what I can control is how I react when things just don't turn out as I envisioned. And from now on, when moments like this occur (because they always do), I will react with love and light and nothing less.
Numero Dos: Save some room for grace.
Finesse, poise, grace... Give me all you have of it and then I'll take a little more. One of my favorite verses right now is:
Part of 2 Corinthians 12:9: "My grace is enough; it's all you need. My strength comes into its own in your weakness".
I mean talk about being humbled by God's love for you. Last year was full of some many subtle moments in which God reminded me I didn't have to have it right the first time. Or that it's okay to say sorry and feel vulnerable and weak. I think with all that goes on today, right at our fingertips, it's so easy to get too hard on yourself for not doing or being this or that. My word/mantra/prayer for this year is grace. That I may walk in it, treat myself to it, and throw it around to others as well.
Numero Tres: You have to do this for you, buttercup.
I learned it can't be for likes, or views, or free things. If it doesn't move you and dig it's way deep into your core it just won't work out and doing it for any other reason is pointless. Passion is scary. Trying to figure out what your calling is, well that's down right terrifying but what I did learn is that there is no room for fear. There's no reason to let yourself down and give yourself excuses. You just have to make the decision to do something and do it. I am still a huge work in progress on this one.
So there you have it. My top three lessons learned last year. This year already has so much promise and I seriously hope I can carry these lessons with me, with lots of grace... of course.